Thursday, September 12, 2013

Emotional Side of the Past Year

I started writing the two previous posts with the intention of explaining how the last year has affected me personally, spiritually, and physically. Cancer provides an emotional roller coaster that is hard for someone to explain without having experienced it personally or watching a loved one through their diagnosis and treatment plan. I have always been one to remember dates and I will never forget the days of diagnosis, surgeries, or heart breaking news. My birthday used to be something special, but after 2011 became Just Another Day. Ashley reminded me that every single day is a special day and the Lord has reminded me that He is ALWAYS there. He carries us through the storms so that we are able to handle them.

This has been a storm that I never imagined myself coming out of. I have shed countless tears, smiled when others might have been raging, and praised God for His answered prayers through it all. I owe so much thanks to a great group of friends and family that continues to fill in the gaps when they are needed. Today marks a year since I learned that my sister had a terminal diagnosis. At her last CT reading we were told that she had "no evidence of disease." I have many ask if she is now in remission or cancer-free. The answer is, "no." As a Christian I still have faith that a cure or medication could be currently in the process of being invented to save her; we have not lost faith. Ashley does still have the diagnosis of stage 4 cancer and it does often try to provide a cloud over our days, but I will continue to hold the mantra of creating our own sunshine. So...nearly 30 years later (Ash was born a month before my 2nd birthday) I am once again happy to have my sister here to be with me on my birthday. Here is to many more years of celebration.