Each year our family chooses a word and/or motto to use as
our theme for the remaining twelve months. This year I adopted the phrase, Be Intentional. I am the type of person
that normally goes a hundred miles an hour in several different directions and
then wonders why I am tired all the time. The first step that I took in being
intentional this year is to make myself go to bed much earlier. This is easier
to do because I am also forcing myself to wake up early to go to the gym for at
least 30 minutes a day. So far I have only missed 2 days. I find myself less
tired, yet more ready for bed at night.
My free time has also been more intentional. I have actually
said no to two pretty big requests. In previous years I would have been
reluctant to say no out of fear of hurting someone’s feelings or seeming too
inclusive. I discovered in my self-reflection that I don’t have a lot of free
time and when I do have that time I want to be with my circle. My circle needs
to be small for me to process all the things that still need processing. I am
at nearly 3 years in my most recent cycle of loss. Loss isn’t new to me, but it
still is new in the sense that I have had huge and wonderful buffers shielding
me from truly dealing with my loss. I happen to think that my sister had a role
in developing some of these buffers. Up until 2 hours before her passing she
was making sure that Kyle understood her request for us to have another baby.
God is so good to provide me with Ashlin Grace; she has been such an anchor to
showing me how beautiful life can be. Both of my kids bring me such joy.
Back in 2008 our family looked around for something to do in
honor of our son Jackson. Our original intention was to create an annual
fundraiser where we could raise money to give to a NICU family in need. When
our fundraiser exceeded all expectations we started our annual NICU Christmas
bags. We followed this Christmas tradition with participating in March for Babies
the following year. We have participated in nine March for Babies events and
two larger scale fundraising events since then. Not counting the most recent
Signature Chef Auction that raised over 100k, our family team has raised nearly
50k during our nine years of involvement. Kyle and I have always said that we
would walk until we had to be “wheeled to the finish line.” Imagine my heart’s
reluctance when we started to approach the 10th year and it was
being nudged to take the year off.
We haven’t made this decision lightly. We have prayed,
counseled, and created lists, but keeping with our 2018 motto it came down to
being intentional. We will NOT be participating in March for Babies this year.
There are a number of reasons we have come to this decision, but the biggest is
that we have been given a local opportunity to raise funds for something that
needs to be done as quickly as possible. The RiverBend Hospital in Springfield
is currently raising funds to build a MUCH needed Guest House with completion
set for December 2018. During our stay in 2016 we were told that this project
was years away; we spoke to staff and promised each other that when the
opportunity arrived we wanted to help in any way possible.
This year the March for Babies event has moved again and
changed leadership. Instead of feeling overly frustrated at the changes we saw
it as an opportunity for us to take a year off and regroup. We are praying that
they find new leadership to revamp and restructure the walk in our area, but
until then we will put our money and fundraising efforts towards local
charities that need our help. We are asking that in lieu of your annual
donation to March of Dimes on our families’ behalf that you consider making a
donation directly to the RiverBend Guest House fund. I will be providing the
address and online donation link as soon as I receive it. They may have a
scheduled walk at a later time with Ronald McDonald Charities, but at this time
we ask that you just make a donation in memory and/or honor of someone you know
that has spent time in the NICU.
Kyle and I were fortunate to be able to stay nearly 60 days
in the original Guest House located at the old hospital when Bronson was born
in 2007. Although this structure remains (being donated for other use) it is several
miles away and depending on the time of day can require a very long car ride
for parents to get to and from the new NICU. While Ashlin was in the NICU we
moved our 1980s 5th wheel up to the hospital where were provided
with an electrical hookup. We had to be very careful about our water/sewage
usage during those 2 weeks, but again felt humbled to have a place to stay that
was close to our baby. This was not an ideal place to stay as there were
several abandoned trailers in the area and some illegal activity that went on
at night. The couple of nights that Kyle had to go home I requested either my
mom or a friend to stay with me because I didn’t feel safe. We casually
suggested to the nurses that it would be amazing if the hospital could get some
of the land nearby to build a Guest House or a certified full hook up for NICU
families. All of us joked as if it was a pipe dream. Well, those dreams are
becoming a reality. I have been told that the RV hook up will be a next phase,
but this phase is a fully functioning Ronald McDonald House for NICU families
and long-term hospital families. Pediatric families will be able to stay free
of charge with the remaining rooms being rented for $40 night to those in long
term care for the rest of the hospital.
A few details about the project: Peace Health donated the
land for the house. Sacred Heart Foundation needs to raise a total of $6
million to build the house. They have raised $3 million so far. Let’s see how
much of a dent our family fundraising can do. Please let me know if you are
interested in being a Sacred Heart Foundation sponsor and I will send you more
information. Consider making the same donation you would normally make to March
of Dimes. These funds will be used to build a house to help NICU families
during their stay; what better way to support families in the NICU. Thank you
for helping us create an intentional fundraiser for 2018.